Lost.

Babyy, this post is dedicated to you (: Yes, today I really said out everything I kept in my heart for such a long time. It really pains me when I found out all those truth. Yesterday when you picked up the call from her phone, I was deceiving myself. I told myself it wasn't you when clearly, it is. I know, it's you, I kept lying to myself repeatedly. You told lies all over again. I thought you won't but you actually did. I tried to keep myself occupied so that I won't think of all those. I even told myself, it's okay, but i didn't know I'll hide at the stairs and cry. I feel like a stupid. When no one cares, I've to be alone. It's unlike last time, you'll give me uncondition care, but now, I'm here crying like an idiot for you. I really gave you chances to change. Just as I really wanted to trust you, you broke the trust. I really tried to cast the past aside yet you repeat it again. I'm so confused, I dunno what to do, I dunno what to say. Although I'm disheartened and hurt, I chose to give you another chance. Please. Stop all this things that hurt me. I really need you a lot a lot. It's just a small request, not to lie to me, is it so hard. Anyways, whenever I'm physically with you, I'm always very happy, you never fail to make me laugh but whenever I'm not with you, everything turned otherwise. I really hope things will be better in no time. I really dun wann to quarrel, I wann use to be as sweet as before because I can't let you go. I dunno how to live without you. You're important to me. I realised, I always wanna avoid everything. Because I dun wann quarrel with you but I can't take it anymore. Sorry, I love you.